Self-Improvement / Goal-Setting

4 Obstacles to Change and What You Can Do About Them

posted by: Deana Hudson

Over the years, I’ve seen many people who want to make changes in their lives, including myself. Some succeed completely, some partially, and others disappear when they begin to make breakthroughs. I’ve discovered that there are four main reasons why a person may not follow through and achieve their goals.

1. You don’t want the goal enough to do what is necessary to achieve it. Some people want to just dream about their desire, without putting any effort or action into its creation. Just imagining how a room will look with new paint on the wall and the furniture recovered won’t get it done. Visualizing what you want and then taking steps to order the paint and sew the fabric for the furniture will be what manifests it for you.

The same is true for any goal. To reduce weight, you have to ingest fewer calories than you use and get active. If you want a greater income, you may need to ask for a raise, get more training, or move your residence. In some cases, a complete lifestyle change (mental and physical) may be in order.

2. There’s a conflict between your conscious and subconscious minds. Consciously you want your goal, and have been taking steps to achieve it, but keep getting blocked. If this is the case, your conscious and subconscious minds may be disagreeing on whether your goal is acceptable. You subconscious mind is acting on the sum total of all the information its been given over your entire lifetime.

By blocking you, your subconscious thinks it’s helping you. But it’s doing it in a way that you no longer need. You need to communicate to it that you really do want this goal. Let it know that the old messages about the goal no longer applies, that you deserve your desire. You can use affirmations, self-hypnosis, action, journaling, talking to yourself in the mirror or various other techniques to get the subconscious mind’s attention and cooperation.

3. The change makes you too uncomfortable. This is more common that you’d guess. If you change too much, too fast, your subconscious will pull back on the reins. You’ll miss appointments, get sick, or lose interest in your goal. One of the things you’ll probably need is to find new ways to cope with the challenges of your life. This is one of the reasons the subconscious sabotages progress. You’re starting to make changes, but haven’t created new strategies to deal with stress.

If you truly want a fuller life, you have to change the way you think about yourself to fulfill your complete vision. When someone inappropriately criticizes you, instead of heading to the refrigerator to make yourself feel better, tell them to cut it out. If you feel inadequate to handle being promoted, instead of backing out of it, remind yourself of all your positive qualities, all the things you’ve accomplished, and that you can learn new skills.

4. You’re trying too hard. You may want your goal too much, so much that you’re trying to force it to happen. The reason for this is fear that it won’t happen. If this is the case, your subconscious is acting on the fear, and there’s no way you can accomplish your goal while in this state of mind.

Once you’ve done everything you can, let the Universe work with you. Your subconscious is the creative part of you, and the Universe is the power. Tell yourself that your subconscious and the Universe know how to manifest anything you want. Remember things you’ve manifested in the past by trusting in the Universe. Then let your subconscious and the Universe take care of the details.

Most people want to improve their lives, but don’t know what to do when things aren’t moving forward. They can’t identify what’s holding them back. Once you recognize the obstacle, you can then begin to dismantle it. Use any tools that can help you, and start chipping away at the blocks. Soon you’ll have a clear path to your goal.

Inspiration

Living Your Dreams

By: Dr. Kelly Psychic Counselor

Too many of us live in a “bad reality” state of mind. All it takes is flipping that little switch in your mind. Whenever I feel down or want to throw in the towel in regards to my life path and dreams, I know that it’s just my negative thinking switch that’s on! Trust me, sometimes it’s in the on position for a long time! But, I also know that thoughts are just thoughts and in no way reality unless I make them so. That allows me to flip the switch the other way and begin thinking positively which keeps me moving forward.

I do an average of one thousand readings per year. Nearly everyone has some dream in mind that they feel is totally out of reach, yet they can’t let it go! They want to lose weight, to be in a better relationship, to have a more stable financial life, to start their own business, to go back to school, to eat healthier. Many of these people have carried around the dream for a very, very long time. And you know what? The only thing stopping them from achieving their dreams is themselves! Yes, we all have obstacles, but nobody is ever backed completely into a corner with no way to move. There’s always at least a tiny bit of room for movement forward.

How to move forward when you’re feeling crushed under the weight of your problems? Trust me, I know what it’s like to be in a deep, deep hole of debt, health problems, and no food in the house with kids to support. You get to a place where you can’t possibly see the light at the end of the tunnel. Even if you did, you’d think it was a train coming to run you down! Now, you have two choices: Spend the rest of your life buried under your problems and dream your days away, or buckle up your courage and determination and change things around! I don’t know about you, but no matter how hard it is to create a better life, I’d rather try than admit defeat!

Buy a notebook and grab a pen, this is your first step to having a better life. Give it an empowering title like, “My life from this moment on”, or, “From dreams to reality.” I titled mine, “This is who I am.” It may sound cheesy, but having that title on your notebook helps to imprint this new life into your mind since you’ll read it each time you pick the tablet up.

Getting down to work. On the first page make a list of where your life isn’t working. On the next page make a list of your dreams. Now…each consecutive page will hold the title of one problem and one dream. So, one page may be titled: Getting out of debt. Another may be titled: Going back to school. Under each title brainstorm ways to overcome the problem or make the dream into reality.

For instance, a few years ago I was living on only $900 a month and had 5 kids to feed, bills to pay, etc. I titled one page: Ways to bring in extra money. I listed as many things I could think of to make extra money without having to go out and get a regular 9-5 job and leave my kids alone all day. (I home school my kids.) I’m an avid book collector, so I figured I could sell them on Amazon. I also went to library sales and bought books for pennies on the dollar and sold them on the site as well. And, I started offering psychic readings on eBay. Great! That got me out of the financial hole I was in! Of course, each of those ideas had their own small steps such as creating ads on eBay, but those two ideas were the quickest, easiest, and cheapest way to begin bringing in money.

What about dreams? I had always wanted to be a multi-published author, and had written romances since I was in my 20‘s, though had never gotten published. Those manuscripts sat collecting dust for 15 years until I found myself divorced for a second time. Being on my own again had me dredging up all sorts of dreams! So, I made a list of ways to get published. I was far too eager–and broke!–to go the traditional publishing route. Printing out manuscripts, paying for postage, waiting eons for a reply…So I did extensive research into eBook publishers and sent some query letters to the top ones on my list. Within the last year alone I’ve signed nine book contracts!

Whether getting out of a rut, overcoming a problem, or making a dream come true, all it takes is determination, courage, and a step-by-step plan. The biggest obstacle to achieving what you set out to do is lack of focus. By breaking big projects or problems down into small steps you can overcome just about anything, and begin living the life of your dreams!